Today is Thursday.

Today is Thursday. I have been in New Mexico for a total of 5 days now. In those 5 days, I have lost my grandfather. I have not been able to be with my family in this time of pain and suffering, and that has been hard for me. My grandfather was an important man in my life, in the lives of my siblings, and in the lives of the rest of my family. He was always there, in all of my memories, he has been a part of it. The one place that I feel more at home is in the river that his house was on. I learned to swim in that river, learned to fish, to use a boat. I spent hours, days, on that river growing up. The last few years I have not been able to spend much time on that river, but even so, it still feels like home. When I am away from home, all I have to do is see a river to feel at peace, to feel as if I am home again. That river, and everything it represents to me, are all tied up with who my grandfather was. I remember all the time that I was able to spend on that water with him. I know that I will always be able to see him out there on that water, pushing that push boat better than I ever could. He died on Sunday, on my first day in New Mexico.

You see, I am in New Mexico student teaching at a school called Rehoboth Christian School. I got here on Saturday, and woke up Sunday morning to heat the news. To find out that my grandfather had gone home. It was not an easy moment for me, to know that he was gone. To know that I would not be able to go home, I would not be able to see him one last time. I would have to be here, even when my heart desired to be there. It was a hard moment. That day I did not feel like going to church, I did not feel like doing much of anything.

I went to church. I went out of a sense of duty rather than a desire to go there. While I was there though, I experienced and was reminded of something that in that moment I had forgotten. My family was here, in this strange place. This place with red dirt, red rocks, no grass, and mountains. This place that I have never been before. My family was here, here in this strange place. As I sat in that church service I was astonished to be greeted and welcomed. I was accepted without anyone knowing a thing about me, though many desired to know why I was there that week. During the service I heard much about life and death, maybe it was because that was what I needed to heat that morning. I felt the weight of my grandfather’s life, his death, on my shoulders. We sang a song, one that I have sung a thousand times before. We sang In Christ Alone. And during that song, I felt Christ’s love, and I felt my family. I knew in that moment that family is more than blood, more than distance, more that death. Christ died and then defeated death, Christ is a strong man.

I felt at home, I felt family here. Even though I am 1441 miles away from where I want to be, I still feel at home, and I still was surrounded by family. Christ’s love, and the family that we have all become a part of, exists in all places at all times. Though my first week here has been hard (I got the flu too) I still feel at home, and at peace. I am still excited to be here, where God has placed me. Excited to see what God has in store for me.